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Do I have to see the coffin disappear behind the curtains at the crematorium?

No. Most crematoria have curtains that close in front of the catafalque (the platform the coffin stands on in the service) during the committal at the end of the service. However, the option to close the curtains or not is entirely up to those making the arrangements and if this something you particularly find distressing we will inform the crematorium that the curtains are to remain open and the coffin left in place. The coffin will not be moved from the catafalque until the service is over and the Chapel is empty regardless of whether the curtains are open or closed.